‘Tis the season for festive celebrations, but if you think you’ve nailed the perfect velvet dress and kitten heels party combination, think again. Looks like 2023-style parties come with some tough holiday dress codes. Over the past few weeks, The Telegraph Fashion desk and I have received invitations with some pretty eclectic outfit themes: “Furs and candlelight”, “La Dolce Vita”, “Refined comfort”. Then Beyoncé arrived with the premiere party for her Renaissance concert film and set a strict dress code for her guests: “Cozy Opulence.”
“Dress codes are everywhere now, even for a dinner party in the city. I love the idea of dress codes, and the wilder and more random they are, the more fun it will be to hunt for the right outfit,” says Gianluca Longo, the always impeccably dressed style director of The World of Interiors. “In the past it was all Studio 54 and The Royal Tenenbaums , everything is fine now.”
But what does all this mean? Are we finally experiencing the euphoric 20s we once dreamed of before the pandemic, when our social lives resembled the opening sequence of a Baz Luhrmann movie? And how can a normal mortal, faced with a strange dress code, who doesn’t create a mood board for life, actually manage? How much sparkle is too much sparkle? “Furs and candlelight” allow the Norse goddess to step out in a fur dress and carry a lantern? (My Gen-Z niece’s girlfriend chimes in here and explains that I should actually think of “furs and candlelight” as more of a social media hashtag vibe; it connotes a cozy hygge vibe, but that means wear a cashmere jogger.)
Are these new dress codes actually rules or puzzles to be solved? Even more formal industry events seem a bit confusing. Take Gwyneth Paltrow and Demi Moore being photographed together at the Council of Fashion Designers of America awards a few weeks ago. As you may recall, GP wore a perfectly tailored, frankly gorgeous cocktail skirt and a sweater (yes, Aspen to be exact) from her own G. Label collection. But Demi looked dazzling in head-to-toe jewels with a mirror ball, sparkling silver sequins, courtesy of Carolina Herrera.
Dear readers, the dress code for this event was American Black Tie. Even though I lived and worked in New York, this was something new for me. And in case you’re wondering, that’s not listed on the website of the Emily Post Institute, the oracle of American etiquette, among several categories of Black Tie dress requirements, including “Creative Black Tie” and “Black Tie Optional” (the latter). This is the dress code to choose if you want to incite maximum pre-event shopping rage and spousal friction among your entire guest list, at least in my opinion).
I was thinking about all of the above recently when I attended Greek designer Celia Kritharioti’s festive party celebrating her launch at Harrods. The invitation read: “Festive attire, blazers for men”; I thought this was unusually informative in such cases. The party turned into a downright spectacular affair, with sparkles as far as the eye could see and boogy aplenty amid the velvet banquets.
Here I met Sukeena Rao, co-founder, along with Harriet Quick, of personal shopping service Luminaire, whose specialty is dressing customers for such important events. “Celia’s party was a good example of ‘casual opulence’; there were fires burning, the girls were in crystal dresses, but the atmosphere was relaxed,” Rao says when we talk over Zoom the next day. He says he’s noticed a new mood in the air for the 2023 party season, which is reflected in the dress code; something he attributes in part to the global context. “There’s a lot of difficult things going on in the world… People still want to go out and do the Christmas thing and see people, but at the same time it feels a little more warm and welcoming than usual.”
Rao says he interprets a flashy dress code like “casual opulence” as “dress it up, but tone it down a bit,” adding: “It’s about finding something great in your closet. It’s not really about wearing a whole new runway look.”
Taste setters like Rao and the super stylists who dress the stars whose looks we review online every day are, in many ways, setting new standards for how we adhere to sartorial conventions and themes. I talk to celebrity stylist Holly White, who has dressed new talents like Bridgerton’s Charithra Chandon and Heartstopper’s Joe Locke, about her interpretation of the new party dressing rules: “I tend to use the dress code as a guide to gauge the overall feel or energy of the event for the clients but ultimately We aim to achieve something that makes the customer feel their best and most confident! I love seeing how people interpret ‘black tie’; it’s no longer as traditional as it used to be, it’s become much more creative; people are curating their looks in new and interesting ways, while still feeling uplifted and confident. They see it as ‘black tie’.”
So what do the traditional gatekeepers of event etiquette make of all this? I turn to Debrett’s etiquette expert, Liz Wyse.
“Dress codes are definitely becoming more creative and fanciful, and this poses a problem for guests who don’t have a lot of guidance on what level of compliance is required. While code like ‘casual opulence’ is actually a creative way of saying ‘smart evening wear’ (referring to the winter season), ‘furs and candlelight’ is much more esoteric. Apart from carrying a lit candle, guests are advised to look at the ‘furs’ section of the dress code. Of course, there are people who like to go the extra mile when it comes to creative dress codes, but if you are a more cautious and laid-back person, you can just confirm this with accessories such as a furry scarf, furry evening gloves and a furry evening dress. soon. This will show that you are paying attention to the dress code and making a gesture to comply.”
Wyse agrees that our parents’ generation’s dress code has relaxed.
“Dress codes have moved from very strict traditional rules that allow absolutely no deviation to a more relaxed and liberal interpretation. Generally, rules are expected to be followed if these old-fashioned terms are used. It is becoming increasingly common to use more general terms such as ‘cocktail wear’, ‘elegant dresses’ or ‘party wear’. These rules free guests, especially men, from strict restrictions. If they want, they can throw away their dinner jackets and bow ties and switch to elegant lounge suits, velvet jackets, Nehru collars, etc. They may prefer. “Women can choose a dress or trouser combination that they think will make them look stylish and flashy.”
So how do people heading out every night recommend navigating some of the festive sartorial dress codes now on the mantelpiece of The Telegraph team? Elegant gentleman of the city, Gianluca Longo: “I always like the La Dolce Vita dress code: For the ladies, think Anita Ekberg and The Talented Mr. Ripley for men. Refined Comfort? Look at Ralph Lauren.” In general, she advises: “Google the dress code, look at the visual tab and see what comes up, use your imagination to combine and mix.”
Adhering to Tiffanie Darke’s “Rule of Five” and buying nothing new for the season, fashion entrepreneur Maria Kastani says she wants to look and feel “sweet, beautiful and delicious” at parties after the difficult year she’s had. , but she’ll rummage through her closet for her favorite gorgeous outfits and let her accessories appeal to any party theme. The new party vibe is “more about feeling than looks,” she says.
Sukeena Rao agrees with a more considered approach to buying this season and advises her customers to invest in knockout accessories. “I think most women have something fabulous in their wardrobe that they can mix with, say, a black leather glove from The Row or mesh boots from Alaia and take it to a different level.”
And it’s a bit unnerving what words of advice she has for more cautious dressers who find the courage to elevate their outfits to “casual opulence” levels below Beyoncé.
“Play fun, loud music as you get dressed, and keep adding more accessories than you’re used to. “They may leave immediately after arriving at the party… or they may not.”
This is a new party dressing rule that I definitely plan on following. Turn up the music!
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