On another day when his players were absent and he watched Manchester United concede three goals for the ninth time this season, the only consolation for Erik ten Hag was that Bayern Munich were just as bad.
Bayern’s 5-1 score against Eintracht Frankfurt may provide some encouragement to Ten Hag as he prepares to welcome the German champions to Old Trafford on Tuesday.
But if United play this poorly – and it’s hard to overstate how shocking they were in almost every aspect of the game against the magnificent Bournemouth – then they could bid farewell to the Champions League.
In this case, even if they beat Bayern, the Galatasaray-Copenhagen match will have to end in a draw in order to advance to the knockout phase.
But Bayern certainly won’t be this poor again, whereas you don’t know which United will come out from one match to the next.
This could not have been further removed, given his brave display of attacking intent in the 2-1 home win against Chelsea on Wednesday. Bournemouth were superior on and off the ball throughout the pitch, wanting more and defending and attacking with an intelligence, cohesion, urgency, aggression and intensity that stood in stark contrast to the opponents’ back-footed offerings.
United have put in some miserable performances in recent months but this, their 11th defeat in 23 games in all competitions and their seventh defeat in 16 games in the Premier League, was their worst. Even worse was the 1-0 capitulation at Newcastle the weekend before.
Ten Hag claims he has his players’ full back, but displays like this don’t mean much. Equally, when players are second best in all areas mentally, physically and tactically, the manager is not hiding anything.
When Bournemouth plundered a third with 17 minutes of normal time remaining, many United fans decided they had seen enough and headed for the exit. Bournemouth were due to add a fourth through Dango Quattara after further defensive madness from United, but the home side were granted a reprieve by Var, with Quattara adjudged to have handled it correctly as he headed past Andre Onana to score.
Boos greeted the break and the whistle blew towards the end of the game and the only notable chant of the day was Anthony Martial’s speech; How is he still playing for this football club? – He was removed from the game in the 56th minute and replaced by Rasmus Hojlund.
The difference between Martial’s performance and Bournemouth’s No.9 could not be starker and in many ways sums up the difference between the sides. Solanke put in an outstanding performance, scoring his 8th Premier League goal from Lewis Cook’s cross after half-time for United to put his side ahead with a superb first-time finish just five minutes later. And so the tone was set for the afternoon.
United have fallen behind in half of their 16 Premier League matches this season, conceding nine goals in the first half hour in all competitions. Indeed, they have only led the Premier League for 106 minutes at Old Trafford this season. You can’t hope to be competitive with statistics like that. This is a team that routinely starts slowly and often shoots itself in the foot.
This was, by contrast, one of the best days in Bournemouth’s history. Andoni Iraola’s reign was slow going but now it has gained momentum; it was their fourth win in five league matches. They were excellent all over the pitch, from Solanke up front, to Marcus Tarvenier and Antoine Semenyo on the wings, to Cook and Ryan Christie in midfield.
The entire back four were outstanding; Centre-back Marcos Senesi headed home a third from Tavernier’s corner after substitute Philip Billing had made it 2-0 five minutes earlier from another United burst.
Harry Maguire did his best and Sergio Reguilon tried to create momentum going forward from left back but most United players hid or were unable to do so. Bruno Fernandes’ yellow card means he will miss Sunday week’s visit to Liverpool, but on this evidence the captain will not be missed. Sofyan Amrabat, next to him in midfield, looked like he had spent the afternoon running on molasses. Bournemouth’s first goal came from a poor pass from Fernandes, which Scott McTominay was slow to deal with. But Cook started from eight yards ahead at Amrabat before crossing to pass him for Solanke to finish.
United’s starting three, Martial, Antony and Alejandro Garnacho, were terrible, especially in the first half. Garnacho improved slightly after the break. It is not possible to say the same for the other two. So we went back to the drawing board for Ten Hag. Bayern can only hope he has another bad day on Tuesday.